My name is Maya Miller. At the time, I was twenty-nine years old and working nights and double shifts as a neonatal intensive care nurse in Columbus, Ohio. When people hear “NICU nurse,” they usually picture soft voices, tiny blankets, and little knitted hats. There is some of that. But there is also terror. There are machines breathing for babies smaller than a bag of flour. There are parents sleeping upright in stiff chairs because walking away from the hospital feels like betrayal.
I knew how to stay calm in the middle of pain. I knew how to move quickly without looking afraid. I knew how to comfort strangers while my own heart felt worn thin.
What I still had not learned was how to stop hoping my own parents would finally see me. Parenting
Two years earlier, I had moved back into their house to save for a nurse practitioner program. It was supposed to be temporary. My mother, Susan, had cried at the kitchen table and said it would be wonderful to have her daughter home again. My father, Robert, had cleared his throat and said, “As long as you do your part.”
I believed them.
That was my mistake.
